Hello again. It’s been a while since we talked.
I see you’ve moved on while I’ve been holding on.
Oh, do I hate being right.
I gave up without a fight. All’s lost, quite lost.
I’m happy for you, I tell myself, swallowing tears
that swim down my face. Why? I don’t know.
And you left her like you left me. Alone. In silence.
I felt you move. Left me tense, nervous, sending
wave after wave of protection, for I did not know.
I should be happy but I’m weeping.
She doesn’t know. She doesn’t know.
I will always miss the little boy inside of you,
the one who sang and was giddy when I told
you that I loved you.
I will miss the talks and the long late night
sleepy conversations and hearing your
soft snores. I will miss the moments that we shared.
Most of all, I will miss the dream that I bought
so dearly. Oh, I will miss the dream of us that
proved to be so delicate.
I wish you knew. Wish you knew how much
I’ve always been there, in the shadows, always
waiting, hoping, wishing for a smile.
I wish you knew I took it for real. Never a game,
this is my life, my soul. Never a game.
I couldn’t save her. I couldn’t save you.
Now I must save myself.
Always a part of me you will be.
On these bones I will grow
On these bones I will build
I am strong. I will survive.
And I will love again.